Toys for Nots

Renee CK

writer, editor, tweetable http://twitter.com/chicskirt

I'm a fun girl who's on a quest to figure it all out. I'm cynical but living the dream- I'm not sure how that happened exactly. Follow along in my blog for fun, mayhem, and merriment. There's never a dull day! (Or, go download my book!)...

Friday, November, 28, 2008

I’m going to tell a story that will probably garner me a few nastygrams and risk my popularity around here. But, I was so disappointed when I saw it play out that I’ve only told a trusted few people up until now.

My first Christmas in Atlanta, I worked with a Marine wife. They were kind people and took in the “Christmas orphans”, i.e. the people who had no place else to go on Christmas. Christmas Eve night we met at her house, played with the kids and watched a movie with them until it was time for them to go to sleep. Dad went in to tuck them in, and when he came down, he carried the Santa presents. One of them was a Tickle Me Elmo. This was the first year Tickle Me Elmo was available and he was h-o-t. Selling for hundreds of dollars on eBay, slightly less out of the trunks of cars, and fights erupted in the mall where I was working when the toy stores would get one in. My jaw hit the floor. How had this family who had been working every possible hour they could in order to have Christmas afford Elmo if they could even find him? Of course we had to ask.

“The Toys for Tots bin!” my friend’s husband announced almost proudly.

If it was possible, my jaw dropped even further.

“The toys are for needy families, and trust me, military families are needy.” He went on to say. He had a point. Still, I thought about this organization, the boxes around town that I had always smiled at and tucked a toy into with a mental picture of a Marine in full uniform handing to a child while patting him or her on the head. Now my vision was of a bunch of shaved-head early twenties dads digging through the very bin I had put my toy into, skimming the best gifts before handing off the rest. It burst my Christmas bubble for sure.

As I said, I know this will not garner me any kind of popularity. And I am aware that all organizations have their cheats. But this discovery wasn’t just a realization that a charitable organization is bad, it was that the Marines, possibly the branch of armed services reputed to have the most honor, did not.

I’m not trying to take away from the Marines, but I will tell you that now I pass up the red toy train for other organizations. Autism Speaks to me, but even if it didn’t, there are plenty of other community organizations that I would support. And even in gift giving, I try to look for items that give back to some segment of the population, if not my own family. Regardless how prized the toy is, the memory of making cookies and bath salts will be the best long-term gift I will ever give my family.

Bottom line, please give some serious thought to who you support this holiday season. The same number of organizations are receiving less and being asked for more. There is plenty of opportunity. You can’t control what happens when you give, but if you are educated about your choices, you can have more confidence that your donations do what they are intended to do.

Enjoy!

Renée